Of course, it was just an analogy. As I understand it, you are dedicated to an ideology (or particular interpretation, even if composed from various sources), whereas to know who you are you have to get rid of all ideologies and interpretations. Yes, I consider it to be quite a dilemma (aka predicament). But as you will inevitably find out, this mixing and matching of interpretations cannot reveal who you are. Your path will (in a very roundabout way) eventually lead you to a different approach, one that actually works. Hence, the point was that although there's nothing wrong with your path – there's nothing lost or wasted in this universe and mistakes are oftentimes more valuable than successes – you can save yourself the detour (if you wish).