I get it. I guess my main gripe with this theist / atheist duality is that one is baselessly optimistic and another one fatalistically pessimistic (though atheist like to say they are just realistic). You probably wouldn't believe it, but I agree with how you present reality as uncaring. It's spot on, but in an universe where nothing essentially matters, all human reactions to it do not matter, too. Why then be optimistic, pessimistic, realistic, ecstatic, horrified, or otherwise emotionally disturbed? When all such reactions subside there is a flat "water surface". Some people call that peace.